Feeling Supplanted

Daily Prompt: Green-Eyed Monster

Tell us about the last time you were really, truly jealous of someone. Did you act on it? Did it hurt your relationship? 

Photographers, show us something GREEN.

The first definition I found of the word ‘jealous’ online may not be the best, but it describes what it means to me perfectly.

Jealous: Fearful or wary of being supplanted; apprehensive of losing affection or position.

It’s a difficult thing to find people in this world to love and who love you in return. I had recently connected with someone on a very deep level; I felt almost as if we were one person. My best friend was going through her own problems at the time and was very lonely, so I started taking her along on outings with my new friend to make her feel better, and it worked. But it worked a little too well. Soon she started spending more and more time with us until, one day, I called my best friend, only to find that the two of them were hanging out alone. Meanwhile, my new friend had developed a crush on my best friend. Talk about feeling supplanted.

My best friend is a wonderful person. She is beautiful on both the inside and outside, and is smart and caring and funny and a good conversationalist, things I had never really had cause to be jealous of because I had my own little refuge – my group of friends, including my aforementioned new friend. However, current events caused me to feel like my tiny bit of territory was being encroached upon, and that gave birth to an acidic jealousy.

I did nothing. I told myself that as a friend, if I really loved either of them, my duty was to help them grow and make new friendships – not cut down the ones they managed to form on their own. So I said nothing and waited, which prevented my relationships from coming to harm, but burned me. Slowly, however, the situation improved. I still have all of my friends in my life. And even though I sometimes still feel that familiar feeling of jealousy welling up within me, I manage to suppress it, because I know that what I might gain by giving it expression would be less than what I’d lose – two of my best friends and a lot of love.

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